A way to close the gap

Have you ever felt bothered about the gap between how much information you've taken in compared to how much of it you've put into practice? I'm thinking of all the sermons I've heard and of all the books I've read and of the many blog posts I've written! If I were to put everything into practice that I've absorbed in those ways, I would be truly quite amazing, thank you very much! And it's the blog posts that really bug me, because they're things that I often feel God is depositing directly into my heart. Why can't I at least be walking my own personal writings? In fact, it makes me wonder if I should keep writing about present lessons learned if the new blog posts are simply distracting me from past lessons forgotten. If this blog was simply a collection of anecdotes from my life rather than a catalog of applications to live, I'm sure I could write on without reservation. But it's not, and I'm now beginning to wonder if I get more satisfaction from writing about what I'm learning than from seeking and obeying the God I'm learning from, for it's not uncommon to find me spending more time writing about insights I've gained from reading God's Word than praying for His help to live what I'm learning. And I'm quite certain that Jesus didn't say "If you love Me, you will write about my commandments." He'd rather we keep His commandments (John 14:15). And as I continue to write more, I feel a growing gap between what I know and what I do -- what I understand and what I undertake. That can only go on for so long until there's gap so large that I'm no longer living an honest life. But if it's the same challenge re sermons I've heard and books I've read, I can't say that I believe the answer is to stop listening to sermons or to stop reading. So what's to be done?

I was recently reading about William Wilberforce's life, and he stressed the importance of desiring God more than simply knowledge or understanding. And he cultivated his desire for God through what he referred to as the "retired hours" of prayer. Wilberforce also saw that there was a link between life and doctrine, and that link was prayer. In other words, the truths we understand can only consistently become truths that we live through seeking God and depending on Him for strength.

I want to grow in my desire for God more than in my desire for understanding. But knowing that as we seek God, He wants to give us increased understanding, I also want my growing desire for God -- expressed in the retired hours of prayer -- to be the link that I need between what I know and what I do. That may mean I spend less time writing, and then use the time that I once spent writing to pray. I doubt that'll affect too many people anyway. And if there actually is anyone who still wants to know what my mind is on in the wider gaps between my blog posts, just look in the archives of this blog and you may find me there as well, praying for God's help in living some of those past lessons learned.

© 2011 by Ken Peters

My struggles living in an I.T. world

I'm not entirely sure why, but I've never been a huge fan of all the spanking new information technology that's constantly out there, or with the ever-accelerating momentum of today's massive I.T. marketplace. At times I wonder if it's because I feel so technologically incompetent that I feel too intimidated to learn how to operate all those new devices. And at other times I think it's because I'm such a cheapskate that I can't bring myself to pay for all this new stuff that gets so old so fast.

But I've never been entirely satisfied with those reasons. They've never really fully expressed what I feel like is going on inside me every time I hear about the latest thing. It can't simply be intimidation, because I've happily grown quite capable of using some extremely helpful (although admittedly simple) forms of I.T. technology over the years. And I know it's deeper than just being tight with my money, because I'm quite happy to spend money on many other things that I could easily live without. There's something else. Speaking in a general sense, I think it's that there seems to be such a collective headlong rush to get the newest and the latest that we end up neglecting the oldest and the truest. Speaking personally along the same lines, I've found that I'd often rather Google something or Facebook someone than simply sit down and pray and read God's Word. And the more distracted I get, the more easily I end up preferring the pursuit of an Ipad (or how about a plasma TV) over the pursuit of how to obey what I heard God say during unhurried times with Him. Yes, too often it feels like these new technologies can create such attention-demanding distractions that it's difficult to avoid feeling like the I.T. world is at odds with God's kingdom. In actual fact, it doesn't have to be that way. When used wisely, these new technologies represent huge opportunities to help advance God's kingdom.

© 2011 by Ken Peters

The kind of strength I need

I tend to think of the apostle Peter as a big strong fisherman who could haul in heavy nets full of fish, heave on heavy canvas sails and pull up heavy boats onto a beach. I tend to think of him as a man who had gained his self-confidence from his broad-shouldered, man-against-the-elements approach to the livelihood he'd embraced. And so it doesn't surprise me that when Jesus told Peter that He was praying for him so that his faith wouldn't fail (Luke 22:33), Peter responded by saying that he'd go to prison and even die for Jesus (v.33)! That's when Jesus warned Peter that'd he'd actually deny that he even knew Him -- not once, but three times before that very night was over. And when that happened, and the rooster crowed just like Jesus said it would to signal Peter's denials, it says that "the Lord looked at Peter" (v.61) and that Peter "went out and wept bitterly" (v.62).

The strong man no longer felt strong. The strength he thought he had had failed him. I'm sure the Lord's look was a look of love, but Peter must have felt exposed nonetheless. Exposed as weak -- something he'd never thought himself to be. And through that experience, Peter must have learned that the kind of strength he needed -- and would soon have -- was of a different nature than the forcefulness and aggressiveness of a seasoned fisherman. He needed a strength of heart that came from heaven and that depended on God rather than on guts.

And I have to wonder which sort of strength I'm most inclined to depend on when the pressure is on. Is it the strength of my own momentum as I push to get things done for God, using the forcefulness of my own will to try to make things happen as I offer God a helping hand? That does sound a little like me in the seasons of life that appear more like me doing work for God than like God doing His work through me. Or is it a peaceful yet determined strength of heart that comes from patiently seeking and hearing the voice of God, obeying Him as He leads me? Because I know that only one of those strengths will stand the test of adversity, and only one will bring God glory as I seek to follow Him.

© 2011 by Ken Peters

Trained to do the Impossible!

I'm so grateful that God hears us when we pray! And it's such a thrill to read a description of how the Lord thunders down from heaven, lightning flashing and hailstones flying as He routs the enemies of King David in answer to his prayers (Psalm 18:6-15)! Then verses 17-18 say, "He rescued me from my strong enemy" and "the Lord was my support". It's such a spectacle of God's power in those opening verses of Psalm 18 that it's tempting to think that having "called upon the Lord" (v.6), we can then just sit back and watch God do His thing. He'll just come and rescue me because He delights in me (v.19).

But it's a long psalm, and if I read on, I get a different perspective. "For who is God, but the Lord? And who is a rock, except our God? The God who equipped me with strength... [and] trains my hand for war... For You equipped me with strength for the battle" (vv.31-39). Sure it's God who "made those who rise up against me sink under me" (v.39), and who "made my enemies turn their backs to me" (v.40), but if I'm to apply this psalm to my own life, it's supposed to be me who "pursued my enemies and overtook them" (v.37). In other words, God is not interested in me being an unassertive spectator as I passively watch Him do His thing! He wants me as involved in the answer as I am in the cry for help so that I can grow through the experience of being trained by Him.

That doesn't mean that I end up answering my own prayers. No, it means I get the thrill of participating with God as He enables me to do the impossible as He answers my prayers -- "For by You I can run against a troop, and by my God I can leap over a wall!" (v.29). It very well may be that God wants us to patiently wait in hope for Him to answer our prayers (eg- Psalm 40:1), but I don't think that necessarily means that He wants us to passively wait in hope for those same answers. Some might say that (in a New Testament context) it's simply the act of praying in faith amidst the battles we face that constitutes doing the impossible, but I'm more inclined to believe that God wants us actively taking authority over things in the areas we pray about, and that's how God wants to help us to do the impossible as we "heal the sick, raise the dead, cleanse lepers, [and] cast out demons" (Matthew 10:8).

So I'm asking myself: Am I available to be trained (v.34) and equipped (v.32) and engaged in the battle as I ask God to defeat the enemies I face? Because it seems that He doesn't want to do it without us!

© 2011 by Ken Peters

Needing no "ifs" to Believe God

I've always found it such a striking statement when Jesus bluntly says that even if a man should rise from the dead, people still won't necessarily be convinced of his message (Luke 16:31). But Jesus said it, and it was true of the Pharisees He said it to. They didn't believe Jesus' words even when guards came from Jesus' tomb telling them of an earthquake at the tomb and of an angel who shone like lightning and who rolled away the stone from the tomb's entrance (Matthew 28:2-4, 11-15). Even when the disciples began proclaiming that Jesus had risen from the dead and began performing miracles in His name, the Pharisees still refused to believe Jesus' message. And I think a part of the reason I'm so struck by Jesus' statement is that I still struggle with unbelief in the light of so many living illustrations of God's goodness and grace.

From the stories in God's Word to the stories of my times to the stories of my life, I continually see and hear of what God can do, promises to do, and does -- and yet it's obvious that I'm not fully persuaded of God's goodness. Otherwise, why the struggle in my soul with unbelief? Why the occasional anger with God, offended by His apparent unconcern regarding unanswered prayers? I'm no different than the Pharisees in this, and Jesus might as well have been speaking to me when He said that even if someone should rise from the dead, I wouldn't necessarily be convinced of all they had to say. Jesus rose, and there are still days I doubt Him.

For the Pharisees, the issue was hardness of heart. God forbid that I should harden my heart to God due to my own disappointments! Jesus has been kind enough to open my eyes to see Him for who He really is, and I should need to see nothing else to know that God is good and His plans are perfect. No "ifs" -- no demands. I can simply believe God's Word even when I don't fully understand God's ways. His appeal is clear: "This is the work of God, that you believe in Him whom He has sent" (John 6:29).

© 2011 by Ken Peters

Seeing the Cross

This morning, over 50 churches in Winnipeg closed their doors for one Sunday so that we could all worship Jesus together in one place, at Winnipeg's MTS Centre. It was estimated that 12,800 people were in attendance! And at the center of it all, hanging high above the chairs that filled the floor area was a huge 24-foot cross.

As the worship began, there was so much to capture my attention. The thousands of voices singing passionately to Jesus was such an inspiring expression of devotion and unity. But as I sang from my chair and casually turned to look up at the cross hanging high above the crowd, I had an unexpected emotional response that brought tears to my eyes. I suddenly felt as though I was at Golgotha, the hill on which Jesus died, looking up at the cross on which Jesus was crucified.

There was a crowd around the cross at that time too. They too had to look up to see the cross as it was placed high atop a hill. Some in that crowd were looking up in confusion, and others with compassion, while others in mocking derision. But Jesus willingly gave Himself to hang high above them all, humiliated before them and yet eager to save them. And for a brief moment, I felt as though I was there amongst the onlookers, staring up at the cross of Jesus, wondering at the magnitude of it all, and tears rose up in my eyes. I couldn't help but think, He put Himself on that cross for me. What a scene that must have been.

Today, on January 9, 2011, the crowd around the cross I saw was of a different sort. We were united in our response of praise and gratitude to Jesus who died to save us. For today was no crucifixion scene. Today was a celebration of the exaltation of the One who hung there on a cross so long ago, and who has now been exalted to the throne above every throne!

But for a brief moment, I saw Him there, high up on a cross. And His love for me seemed as clear to me as it has ever been.

© 2011 by Ken Peters

Overcoming cynicism regarding prayer

Today I read a brief comment on prayer that I found extremely helpful. In the 20+ years of praying for my wife Fiona, I have sometimes struggled to maintain an unwavering conviction regarding the power of prayer. But I was encouraged to discover in the brief quote below that I'm not alone in such struggles and that there is a cure for them.

Paul Miller, who wrote the book A Praying Life, is doing an ongoing interview on the blog of Desiring God. In his answer to the second question he was asked, he spoke about cynicism in prayer: How would you describe the problem of cynicism, and what is your advice to those who are struggling with it?


"Cynicism is my biggest struggle in prayer. It is a quiet, cold rationalism that dulls the soul and just kills your walk with God. It is hard to even identify or name our cynicism because it just feels like being realistic. It says things like, 'What good does it [prayer] do?' or 'It [the answer to prayer] would have happened anyway.'

"I think we are particularly susceptible to cynicism in the Reformed world because we are an intellectual world. We are rightly concerned about our ideas being correct, but we don’t always pay attention to our heart being correct.

"I think without a doubt that the principal cure for cynicism is to become a little child and learn to cry out for help—to realize that I am a lost coin, a lost sheep, and a lost son.

"One other cure for cynicism is purity of life. Any time there is a miss between how we present ourselves as Christians and what we are really like when no one is watching, that opens up a door for cynicism. So a lifestyle of repentance and confession goes a long way to cure cynicism."

© 2011 by Ken Peters

Firmly rooted for the coming year

Back on December 5, 2001, God said something to me that changed my life. It was about 5pm and I was sitting alone at my desk at home staring at a blank computer screen. I had been feeling very low for many weeks and all I could muster as a throwaway prayer was, "God, what's going on?" But as soon as I uttered those words, a thought flew into my mind: "It's not what I do for Christ, but who I am in Christ that matters." In other words, all the perceived failures that were leaving me so utterly depressed had absolutely no impact on God's view of me. Whatever I did or didn't do just didn't matter. It was only because I was in Christ that God loved me unconditionally as His son. At the very moment that God put that thought in my mind, everything changed. The heaviness lifted. The darkness passed. The depression evaporated. I was free. Free of a performance-mentality before a God who fully accepted me as His dearly beloved son.

That was nearly ten years ago. And for many years after that God-encounter I walked in the good of that revelation. But for the past year or so, I feel as though I've lost sight of the simplicity of that truth: "It's not what I do for Christ, but who I am in Christ that matters." And as I approach 2011 and the ten-year mark of that precious moment when God's Spirit dropped that gem in my mind, I want to fully recover the priceless value of it in my everyday walk with God.

Back in 2001, there was a key passage that God spoke to me through to confirm how rock solid the truth of His love really is. Colossians 2:6-7 says, "Therefore, as you have received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in Him, having been firmly rooted and now being built up in Him and established in your faith, just as you were instructed, and overflowing with gratitude." I've chosen the NASB here because of how it translates one particular phrase: "having been firmly rooted." That is how we as Christians are to see ourselves, and that was how God wanted me to begin seeing myself when He spoke to me that afternoon.

The NIV doesn't quite capture Paul's emphasis here and the New Living Translation misses it completely, referring to the idea of letting your roots go down into Christ as if they weren't already. But what Paul is meaning here is that we already have been fully rooted in Christ! When Paul wrote about being "rooted" he used a perfect passive tense, which points to an action completed in the past that has ever-continuing effects! Thomas Trevethan (who wrote Our Joyful Confidence: The Lordship of Jesus in Colossians (if you can find this out-of-print book used, buy it and read it -- it's amazing!)) writes that the full sense of this perfect passive participle is "once-and-for-all settled in a fixed spot not to be uprooted." In other words, nothing can shake us loose from being fully in Christ, fully accepted by God!

If we can live our lives fully convinced of that truth, nothing will be able to discourage us, because nothing can shake us loose from His hand of love. So in 2011, instead of focusing on me (and my blunders and my expectations and my disappointments), I want to make Christ and who I am in Christ my focus so that I can live in the joyful confidence that being in Christ is meant to provide every day!

© 2010 by Ken Peters

Reading List 2010

I'm a slow reader. Which leaves me reluctant to read as well as forever reading once I start! And because I read so slowly, I end up reading quite a few books at the same time. I'm sure it reflects a lack of discipline, but I simply find that because it takes me so long to finish books I start, as I'm plowing through one book, I get distracted by another, and possibly another (and sometimes even another!). But I eventually get back to most of the books I begin reading.

This is a list of the books I read in 2010 (in the order I completed them). Apart from all the books listed here, I also read the Bible through each year. I believe the Bible is God's inspired Word to us, and of all the things I read, I see the Bible as what is most essential for me to be feeding on. Most of the postings I add to my blog are a result of my time spent reading God's Word.

Perhaps there's a book listed here that you'd enjoy reading. And please feel free to leave a comment if there's a book you'd like to recommend that I read in 2011. Just give me plenty of time to do so if I decide to read it!

1. Under the Unpredictable Plant by Eugene Peterson. I read this book during a 3-day spiritual retreat in January.  It was a particularly timely book for me to read, as I was struggling with some issues that this book addresses for pastors. Though I struggled with the blanket judgments that Peterson sometimes seems to make about other pastors, I found his urgent emphasis on finding a spiritual rhythm that keeps God as more important than ministry extremely helpful.
2. Oliver Twist by Charles Dickens. Had a hankering for a little Dickens, and I decided to finally discover how much of the book wasn't included in the movie. It was an enjoyable read, but I often find Dickens novels more than a little contrived by how every little thing comes together in the end and by how every character seems more like a caricature of either good or evil.
3. Brothers, We are Not Professionals: A Plea to Pastors for Radical Ministry by John Piper. This book is a passionate call to Christian leaders to keep first things first and to minister out of a life in God rather than out of a professionalization of the ministry. And with thirty chapters, it's more about keeping the first thirty things first! But Piper makes a clear case for each issue, and leaves me wanting to grow in all of them.
4. Hudson Taylor's Spiritual Secret by Dr. & Mrs. Howard Taylor. Amazing.  Faith building. Life-changing. This book has changed the way I pray. It has given me a higher view of God and a greater sense of my oneness with Christ.  This particular book is an abbreviated version (half the length) of a longer biography written by the same authors about one of the most fruitful pioneer missionaries in the history of Christianity. Hudson Taylor's profound commitment to living an "exchanged life" as he depended on God for his every need has made the story of his life a great example to anyone who desires to live their life fully committed to Jesus.
5. Spiritual Leadership:  Moving People on to God's Agenda by Henry and Richard Blackaby. This is the best book on leadership I've ever read. That said, I found it a great challenge to complete (after beginning it over a year ago!) due to how densely packed each and every chapter is. It was so full of relevant leadership principles that I found myself underlining stuff on nearly every page!
6. Finally Alive by John Piper. This book became more and more helpful as I read it, and was truly meat to be chewed on. It deals with the flippant and demeaning way the term "born again" has come to be used in North America. And it affirms how being born again is a profound supernatural event that leaves a person radically changed, despite what careless telephone surveys may say to the contrary! God has made us "truly, invincibly, finally alive", and knowing the implications of that is a great encouragement.
7. God is the Gospel: Meditations on God's Love as the Gift of Himself by John Piper. This was the second time I'd read this book, this time as a part of a small group book study.  It is a book that unflinchingly nails a blessings-based North American Christianity right between the eyes! The question it asks again and again is do we truly want God or do we simply want His salvation blessings of peace and forgiveness?  But what has made it such a compelling book to me is the way John Piper exalts Jesus Christ as the only One who can truly satisfy our deepest longings. It's a book that leaves you hungry for Jesus!
8. When Heaven Invades Earth: A Practical Guide to a Life of Miracles by Bill Johnson. After watching a video of Bill Johnson, I felt prompted to want to find out more about his theological approach to the issues of healing and the sovereignty of God. But more than that, I've been feeling a growing hunger in my heart to see God's power at work in the lives of people who are in desperate need of miracles. This book is about the reality of God's Kingdom invading earth, and my prayer is that that reality will become more real to me than the keys I use to type these words!
9. The Supernatural Power of a Transformed Mind by Bill Johnson. I have found my struggling faith strengthened by Bill Johnson's fresh perspective on what the Bible has to say about God being an active, invasive, here-and-now God who does the miraculous as we take up the authority He has given us. I've been encouraged as I've been processing the Biblical teachings of a man who has regularly seen God move miraculously.
10. Gilead: A Novel by Marilynne Robinson. This is a Pulitzer Prize-winning novel written as an autobiographical letter from an aged father to his young son. It is both random and reflective in many ways, but has much to do with the theme of father/son relationships and has a strong spiritual pulse in the many fatherly musings and memories. Some of the father's memories go back to his grandfather's time in the Civil War, and ever since I lived in the United States, I've always appreciated reading about that period of American history.
11. Discipleship on the Edge: An Expository Journey through The Book of Revelation by Darrell W. Johnson. I began reading this book in the fall of 2009, and even though it took me awhile to finish it, I really enjoyed it. It was given to me as a gift, and I wanted to read it because of how impacted and excited I've felt the last couple times I've read Revelation. I wasn't disappointed. Every chapter clarified my understanding and made the Book of Revelation much more relevant in my everyday life.
12. Strength in What Remains by Tracy Kidder. The story of a remarkable man who narrowly escaped from the dangers of a chaotic civil war in Burundi only to find himself lost among the dangers of NYC, America. But through the kindness of strangers who were willing to help him, he not only flourished in America, but was able to eventually return to Burundi to offer help that would transform an impoverished community.
13. What Jesus Demands from the World by John Piper. Fifty demands, all drawn from what Jesus said in the four Gospel accounts in the New Testament. Fifty chapters, all relatively brief, each one unpacking a command Jesus instructed us to observe. If you want a book that will challenge you while also emphasizing the grace of God we need to meet the challenge, this is the book for you. There's no shortage of application in this book! So much so, that I typically only read one or two chapters a week lest I'd have too much to work on all at once!
14. Father to the Fatherless: The Charles Mulli Story by Paul H. Boge. The true story of a Kenyan man whose life began in desperate poverty, and who eventually became a highly successful businessman who then felt called to reach out to help orphans and street children in a way that would give them the same hope in Jesus and the same hope for their future that he experienced.
15. The Perfect Storm: A True Story of Men Against the Sea by Sebastian Junger. Every so often I pick up a book to read simply as a diversion -- a book about some faraway place or some extreme circumstance. In such instances, I'm fond of books about the desert or the sea. This book has been sitting on my shelf for years, and I suddenly felt inclined to read it. As usual (when I read such books), I was impacted by the courage of those who risk their lives at sea.

© 2010 by Ken Peters

The Path to True Rest

As Christmas approaches, I'm really looking forward to having a few extra days off from work. I've outgrown the anticipation of gifts, but in its place is a craving for calm -- a time to dial down and relax. But I'm all too aware from past experience that such rest can be elusive, even when my schedule is emptied. And I also know it's possible to end a holiday break as weary as the day it began, even if I do very little during that break. I think that's because I'm seeking external rest when what I really need is internal rest. I'm resting my body while my heart remains restless.

And as I was reading the Letter to the Hebrews in my Bible this month, I think I began to understand the path to the kind of rest I really need. In Hebrews 4, the writer mentions "the promise of entering His rest" (4:1), and assures us that that promise still stands. But then he issues a warning about the rest God promises us: "let us fear lest any of you should seem to have failed to reach it." That's a valid warning, because in my harried and weary state, I sometimes wonder if I'm failing to reach that wonderful rest God promises, and such uncertainty only adds to the disquiet in my soul. So what to do?

It was only when I noticed what the writer had just been writing about in the previous chapter that I realized the kind of rest he was meaning, and saw how I could remain in the deep, meaningful rest God promises. Just a few verses earlier, in Hebrews 3:12, there is another warning issued: "Take care, brothers, lest there be in any of you an evil, unbelieving heart, leading you to fall away from the living God." That's a serious warning. And six verses later, referring to God's posture toward the children of Israel, it says, "And to whom did he swear that they would not enter His rest, but to those who were disobedient? So we see that they were unable to to enter because of unbelief" (3:18-19). In other words, the evil of unbelief in their hearts robbed God's people of God's rest.

Does that same warning apply to me? And is it possible to have a whole sabbatical (let alone a brief Christmas break), and still not feel at rest at the end of it all if one doesn't heed such a warning? Well, as the writer continues and addresses the Christians he was writing to, he says, "Since therefore it remains for some to enter it [God's rest], and those who formerly received the good news failed to enter because of disobedience [the disobedience of unbelief], again He appoints a certain day, 'Today,' saying through David so long afterward, in the words already quoted, 'Today, if you hear His voice, do not harden you hearts.'... So then, there remains a Sabbath rest for the people of God... Let us therefore strive to enter that rest, so that no one may fall by the same sort of disobedience" (4:6-11). That "same sort of disobedience" he's writing about was the disobedience of unbelief that he'd previously mentioned (in 3:18-19). And that hardening of their hearts is also a reference to what we're doing when we walk in unbelief.

This means that true rest -- the "rest" God promises -- the rest my soul continually craves -- is something we can only find by believing God. Because if the sin of unbelief is what prevented God's people from entering His rest, it only seems fair to say that the virtue of believing God will open the door to God's rest. In fact, I wonder if it's fair to say that believing God is the "rest" God promises in Hebrews 4:1. Believing God is rest for our souls. And we lose that rest every single time we fall into unbelief.

So as I long for rest and refreshment during this Christmas season, I'd be wise to note that the surest way to find rest for my soul is to take God at His Word, to trust His promises, to accept His instructions and to walk in His ways because I believe His will to be "good and acceptable and perfect" (Romans 12:2). That's rest. That's freedom from the pain of trying to get things done my way.

And as I've pondered all this, I was alarmed at the thought of how easily unbelief can creep into my heart and rob me of the rest of believing God. The antidote is to attack unbelief wherever I see it in my life -- to turn from it quickly, and by God's grace, to grab that door-handle of believing God so that I can enter His rest as easily as stepping into a room full of God's promises. Now that sounds like Christmas!

© 2010 by Ken Peters